Lost Forty

Hello friends and neighbors from hot and muggy Pennsylvania. It's time to put some soda crackers in the sugar jar. Whew! Summer's here for real. And I haven't installed the window shaker (a/c) yet, to help me "deal" with the real.

I continue to feel great however. Especially when I consider how I felt earlier. Not taking chemo does have some benefits. Of course I may be taking some months off my life. I continue to consider if, when, and/or how this pancreatic cancer will start to take over or spread. Where will it show up? Maybe it has, but I don't know it. I don't get another MRI until early July. Regardless, I'm going to enjoy this time and our big upcoming wedding event next Saturday when Annie and Adam get hitched and we officially welcome a daughter into the family.

Last August, while visiting in Minnesota, our family took a road trip from Bemidji to visit the Lost Forty in the Chippewa National Forest near Blackduck, Minn. The Lost Forty is about 144 acres of fantastic old trees up to 350 years old that were spared from logging crews after some weary surveyors who were marking out townships mistakenly made an error plotting a lake where there was a forest. It's a very interesting place to visit and had a nice walking path.

While there I  decided to purchase a tee shirt with "Lost 40" on it. This is not my normal style... to have a tee shirt with words or advertising. I am not sure what sort of compulsive thing took over me, but anyway I purchased this shirt which was too small for me at the time. I am modeling it below in a picture taken today. You can see it fits me fine now.

I often wonder what people think when they see these words on my shirt. Lost Forty WHAT?

Today I told Barb it can represent several things at the same time:

1. The area of mature forest in northern Minnesota it was originally intended to promote, or
2. The amount of weight, in pounds, I've lost since getting pancreatic cancer, or
3. The points shaved off my IQ due to chemo brain — another insidious side affect of chemotherapy.

That's all for now. Thanks again everyone for your ongoing prayers and thoughtfulness shown to Barb and me and the rest of our family as we continue to live (key word - live) with this uninvited guest.

A chemo reprieve

I am overdue to check in here. I just haven't had much to write about I guess. I've been feeling pretty good and put in a full week at work with no doctor or lab trips to PennState Hershey.

My latest cancer news is that I asked my oncologist if I could delay starting the new chemo pills, scheduled to start yesterday, until AFTER son Adam and Annie's wedding June 2 in Minneapolis. He said "That's fine. Come see me June 8." Hooray! I like this plan. I was very nervous that possible ill side effects from this new chemo — capecitabine (brand name Xeloda®) — could result in a miserable wedding time for me and then the family and then the guests ... and that would be no fun at all!

The chemo pills arrived FedEx last Friday. They were shipped from a specialty pharmacy in Omaha, NE, that my insurance company, UnitedHealthcare, selected. There was no invoice in the box so I don't know the cost, but intend to find out. Fortunately insurance paid all but $12 of the bill. Stay tuned I'll report my findings.

In my last post I mis-wrote that I would be taking "a" pill twice a day. Boy, did I have that wrong! My prescription directive is to take FIVE pills twice a day with food. And these are big pills! Yuk!!! Almost makes venous infusion therapy more appealing. We'll see how it goes.

This afternoon I joined other singers from our church to practice and sing at a memorial service for Naomi Lehman, 89, who passed away May 6. In recent months I've noticed that my voice is getting weaker. When I take phone calls in the office I seem to have difficulty getting strength behind my voice. Barb has noticed this as well. I've been singing bass mostly since moving to PA, but today I couldn't hit low notes with any authority whatsoever. I've had two endoscopies where they put stuff down my throat, but I can't say this weakness was remarkable after the procedures. I have no explanation for this, but add it to my list of cancer-related physical changes:

- Losing 40 lbs.
- Accelerated hair thinning
- Digestive issues
- Declining stamina
- Swollen ankles
- Fatigue, headaches, dizziness
- Diminished voice strength

When I read blogs written by others battling this "Emperor of all Maladies", it puts my situation in perspective. I'm doing quite well compared to many others and feel fortunate in many ways. I appreciate all your prayers for healing, comfort and peace that you say for me and the many others who are in sadder shape than I am. Thank you.